Parents, Take Control.
Equipping you to help your son or daughter deal with sexual sin in their life.
Kenny Luck Kenny Luck is the Founder and President of Every Man Ministries. His enthusiasm for God and life is contagious, as is the zeal that sustained him through a wide range of achievements. He is the men's Pastor and leads the Men's Interactive Bible Study at Saddleback Church in Lake Forest, California, where he serves as a member of the teaching staff. [Go to Every Man Ministries]
9 in 10 kids, between the ages of 8 and 16, have viewed porn online--mostly accidentally while doing homework (UK News Telegraph, NOP Research Group, 1/07/02).
There is no way to avoid the statistics. Pornography is impacting a huge percentage of "good Christian families" all around the world. In fact, due to the added weight of the guilt, secrecy and shame that Christian kids feel around this issue, the problem can spiral downward quickly without the parents being aware.
If your son (or daughter) is online and needs help for Internet porn addiction, here are some steps you can take:
Steps you can take:
START WITH YOU.
Is there any pornography in the home? Are you or your spouse looking at internet porn online or do you have any pornographic videos or magazines? Are you or your spouse watching inappropriate sexually charged movies in the home? If applicable, these things should be removed from the home.
TALK.
Next comes the hard part. Initiate a conversation with your son or daughter. Take some time to listen and create a nonjudgmental environment for him or her to open up to you.
LOOK.
Take time to watch your son’s or daughter’s online behavior. Look at what sites he is looking at. View the history on your home computer. Is he or she using file sharing applications like Limewire or Kazaa? Do a search on your computer for images or videos and see what you find. Don’t have your head in the sand. Take time to be interested in this problem.
ACT.
If you determine that your son or daughter is struggling with pornography, then act. Don’t react, but do act. If appropriate, talk to a Christian counselor today and begin to formulate a swift and specific plan. Contact your church or contact us if you need more ideas on what to do next. You should also consider signing up for Pure Online today to learn more about the recovery process. If appropriate, go through the course with your son or daughter.
Remember, you are the most effective weapon in dealing with pornography in your child’s life. Don’t be the parent that says:
"My son wouldn't look at nude pictures on the web."
"My house is safe because we have filtered internet."
"My little angel only chats with friends online and would never talk to a stranger."
If you want to successfully deal with this problem in your home, it will require significant involvement in your kids (Internet) lives–-including asking the tough questions, and discussing the dangers. We realize talking about pornography is just as hard as talking about sex, but it is time to get out of your comfort zone. Your kids are worth it.
Never have a computer with internet access in a kid’s room. Ever.
Turn on the "Adult content" filter when using Google (click on "preferences" to the right of the Google search window).
Regularly check the History folder on your Browser as it contains a list of recently visited sites.
Unwanted Email (SPAM) is very popular with online porn providers. Never reply to unsolicited E-mails or unsubscribe from receiving further e-mails, as these actions will only confirm that the email address is in use.
